Discussion:
The Second Coming of Jesus
(too old to reply)
Kaptain Krunch
2016-04-12 03:10:59 UTC
Permalink
In article <8dabf1c9-b304-4dbf-a6e6-***@googlegroups.com>,
"Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher"
On Monday, March 7, 2016 at 9:52:37 AM UTC-8, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most
On Sun, 6 Mar 2016 21:00:39 -0800 (PST), "Wise TibetanMonkey, Most
On Sunday, March 6, 2016 at 7:56:41 PM UTC-8, Wise TibetanMonkey,
Yep, we are ready for the next step of evolution. At some point we
must tell people Jesus ain't coming.
Not coming? He ain't even breathing hard.
He gave up the ghost two thousand years ago, telling people to wait
for him.
I think is time to declare him dead.
...we should to declare him what he actually is ..a fictional
character.
Banning that fictional character... doesn't work. It came back with more
power after the experiments in the Soviet Union and Cuba.
Nietzsche declared him dead (it was assumed he was alive at some point)
but he's still going strong.
We must substitute. Pick your favorite character and make it your
partner. I know I will receive "endless massage" from a goddess after I
die. The hunter gatherers weren't alone before the concept of a
monotheist god came along. They had spirits that they invoked and had fun
with. A good hunt gave rise to a party with weed and stuff. I assume that
the hot half-naked dancing by the fire led to some party under the
sheets. Yeah, they celebrated life in a big way. Jesus is just
depressing. A man must have BANANA POWER, you know. He didn't even fuck a
woman. And he's expected to come a second time...
We don't understand the human brain full well. Perhaps we are wired in a
certain way or perhaps we are just brainwashed. "Monkey see Monkey do"
would explain why many people believe. Making sense may not work at all.
We must be able to appeal to the monkey mind.
Above all we must face this issue with a sense of humor. Head to the
liquor store and you are sure to find some spirits. I'm grabbing some
myself. Where's the banana goddess? Yeah, she may be listening.
I'm asking the dear Christian audience, what kind of paradise they offer?
Is praying some kind of substitute for sex? One thing they can't possibly
offer is having fun in the other life. The sex police will whip you every
time you get hard. Once we tell that to the masses, they'll sure won't
want to live forever in such a paradise. I'd commit suicide.
What was the original idea? Yeah, Jesus ain't coming no more.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Jesus sent us his RSVP reply. His Volkswagen broke down. He can't make it.
Hippies like Jesus like the vanagon.
Oh, they need their weed too. ?
DENIED. On the vee dub. We have a good example. There was this
wedding and Jesus was invited. They ran out of wine so Jesus changed
the water in some waterpots into wine.

"When the ruler of the feast had tasted the water that was made wine,
and knew not whence it was (but the servants which drew the water knew)
the governor of the feast called the bridegroom and saith unto him:
Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine and when men have
well drunk then that which is worse but thou hast kept the good wine
until now" (John 2 KJV).
So, by extension, if Jesus returns in a VW it would be the best one ever
driven. Actually he will return on a white horse.
"I saw heaven opened and behold a white horse and he that sat upon him
was called Faithful and True and in righteousness he doth judge and make
war" (Rev 19 KJV)
AGAIN Jesus also said "Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy
laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of me
for I am meek and lowly in heart and ye shall find rest unto your souls,
for my yoke is easy and my burden is light" (Matt 11:28 KJV)
Jimbo
--
http://www.olypen.com/gerrit/index.php
Jeanne Douglas
2016-04-12 07:10:57 UTC
Permalink
Post by Kaptain Krunch
"Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher"
On Monday, March 7, 2016 at 9:52:37 AM UTC-8, Wise TibetanMonkey, Most
On Sun, 6 Mar 2016 21:00:39 -0800 (PST), "Wise TibetanMonkey, Most
On Sunday, March 6, 2016 at 7:56:41 PM UTC-8, Wise TibetanMonkey,
Yep, we are ready for the next step of evolution. At some point
we
must tell people Jesus ain't coming.
Not coming? He ain't even breathing hard.
He gave up the ghost two thousand years ago, telling people to wait
for him.
I think is time to declare him dead.
...we should to declare him what he actually is ..a fictional
character.
Banning that fictional character... doesn't work. It came back with more
power after the experiments in the Soviet Union and Cuba.
Nietzsche declared him dead (it was assumed he was alive at some point)
but he's still going strong.
We must substitute. Pick your favorite character and make it your
partner. I know I will receive "endless massage" from a goddess after I
die. The hunter gatherers weren't alone before the concept of a
monotheist god came along. They had spirits that they invoked and had fun
with. A good hunt gave rise to a party with weed and stuff. I assume that
the hot half-naked dancing by the fire led to some party under the
sheets. Yeah, they celebrated life in a big way. Jesus is just
depressing. A man must have BANANA POWER, you know. He didn't even fuck a
woman. And he's expected to come a second time...
We don't understand the human brain full well. Perhaps we are wired in a
certain way or perhaps we are just brainwashed. "Monkey see Monkey do"
would explain why many people believe. Making sense may not work at all.
We must be able to appeal to the monkey mind.
Above all we must face this issue with a sense of humor. Head to the
liquor store and you are sure to find some spirits. I'm grabbing some
myself. Where's the banana goddess? Yeah, she may be listening.
I'm asking the dear Christian audience, what kind of paradise they offer?
Is praying some kind of substitute for sex? One thing they can't possibly
offer is having fun in the other life. The sex police will whip you every
time you get hard. Once we tell that to the masses, they'll sure won't
want to live forever in such a paradise. I'd commit suicide.
What was the original idea? Yeah, Jesus ain't coming no more.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Jesus sent us his RSVP reply. His Volkswagen broke down. He can't make it.
Hippies like Jesus like the vanagon.
Oh, they need their weed too. ?
DENIED. On the vee dub. We have a good example. There was this
wedding and Jesus was invited. They ran out of wine so Jesus changed
the water in some waterpots into wine.
"When the ruler of the feast had tasted the water that was made wine,
and knew not whence it was (but the servants which drew the water knew)
Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine and when men have
well drunk then that which is worse but thou hast kept the good wine
until now" (John 2 KJV).
What does this quote have to do with the real world?
Post by Kaptain Krunch
So, by extension, if Jesus returns in a VW it would be the best one ever
driven. Actually he will return on a white horse.
"I saw heaven opened and behold a white horse and he that sat upon him
was called Faithful and True and in righteousness he doth judge and make
war" (Rev 19 KJV)
AGAIN Jesus also said "Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy
laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of me
for I am meek and lowly in heart and ye shall find rest unto your souls,
for my yoke is easy and my burden is light" (Matt 11:28 KJV)
And what do these 2 quotes have to do with the real world?
--
JD

"If ANYONE will not welcome you or listen to
your words, LEAVE that home or town and shake
the dust off your feet." Matthew 10:14
Loading...