A Real Eye-Opener
2015-02-10 11:38:30 UTC
BREAKING NEWS
BENTONVILLE, Ark. (Rueters) -- The world's largest discount
department store chain is facing one of its worst nightmares: It
has run out of Ed Conrad Dartboards.
Loading Image...
Not one of its more than 11,000 stores in 27 countries has
a single one left and there are fears that it may be late November
until more are sitting on the shelves in time for the Christmas
rush.
As expected, disgruntled shoppers are going bananas (as
seen in this news photo):
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"We never realized how many people wanted to shoot Ed
Conrad's eyes out and it has exceeded our fondest expectations,"
said Herb Driftwood, executive vice president (Public Relations)
at the chain's headquarters here.
"Running out of these highly popular dartboards is a real
disaster," he added. "I'm sure neither Sam (Walton, founder)
nor his kids ever realized there would be days like this."
Rueters asked one of the more boisterous shoppers why he
was so anxious to own his own Ed Conrad Dartboard.
"We want no part of truth that this assh*le keeps dishing out,"
said a man who said he was a paleontologist at Penn State
University (and requested anonymity). "We much prefer utter
bullshit about death,dying and the true origin and ancestry
of man -- not truth which this turkey has been dishing out
for decades."
====================
DEATH DOES NOT EXIST
Loading Image...&usg=AFQjCNENUU57EaClbbUztSi3thXcQrHEBw
Loading Image...
http://www.edconrad.org
==================
MAN AS OLD AS COAL
(Or: The Greatest Conspiracy in the History of History)
Loading Image...
Loading Image...
Loading Image...
https://groups.google.com/forum/#!topic/alt.true-crime/RT7dFQwy1Mc
http://www.edconrad.com
BENTONVILLE, Ark. (Rueters) -- The world's largest discount
department store chain is facing one of its worst nightmares: It
has run out of Ed Conrad Dartboards.
Loading Image...
Not one of its more than 11,000 stores in 27 countries has
a single one left and there are fears that it may be late November
until more are sitting on the shelves in time for the Christmas
rush.
As expected, disgruntled shoppers are going bananas (as
seen in this news photo):
Loading Image...
"We never realized how many people wanted to shoot Ed
Conrad's eyes out and it has exceeded our fondest expectations,"
said Herb Driftwood, executive vice president (Public Relations)
at the chain's headquarters here.
"Running out of these highly popular dartboards is a real
disaster," he added. "I'm sure neither Sam (Walton, founder)
nor his kids ever realized there would be days like this."
Rueters asked one of the more boisterous shoppers why he
was so anxious to own his own Ed Conrad Dartboard.
"We want no part of truth that this assh*le keeps dishing out,"
said a man who said he was a paleontologist at Penn State
University (and requested anonymity). "We much prefer utter
bullshit about death,dying and the true origin and ancestry
of man -- not truth which this turkey has been dishing out
for decades."
====================
DEATH DOES NOT EXIST
Loading Image...&usg=AFQjCNENUU57EaClbbUztSi3thXcQrHEBw
Loading Image...
http://www.edconrad.org
==================
MAN AS OLD AS COAL
(Or: The Greatest Conspiracy in the History of History)
Loading Image...
Loading Image...
Loading Image...
https://groups.google.com/forum/#!topic/alt.true-crime/RT7dFQwy1Mc
http://www.edconrad.com